he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
