i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
