So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
