I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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