I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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