So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching her eat just hurts me
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
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