That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize