Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
