Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
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