i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
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