Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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