sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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