I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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