it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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