butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
What did we do last night that was yellow?
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Randomize
