he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
