Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
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