She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
