dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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