I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
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