We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Randomize