i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Randomize
