omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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