actually, I'm a sock model
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
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