Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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