I want to make a zoo with you.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
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