just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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