i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
