I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
