I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
