According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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