My entire life is one complicated drinking game
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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