my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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