i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
