I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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