i permit you to call me
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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