I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
