hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
