Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
