There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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