So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
