Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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