I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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