Where are you?
In a non slutty way
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
