i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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