I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
