Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Randomize
