he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
