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• (240): View more from Maryland

  How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?

  Fav 6 867 1659

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• (818): View more from California

  Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.

  Fav 24 3266 743

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"

  Fav 21 1350 6320

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.

  Fav 14 4192 1043

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (515): View more from Iowa

  It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..

  Fav 23 5788 1004

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• (904): View more from Florida

  Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.

  Fav 10 6644 1250

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• (406): View more from Montana

  I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.

  (1-406): View more from Montana

  Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard

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• (479): View more from Arkansas

  I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!

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• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted

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• (407): View more from Florida

  Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation

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• (318): View more from Louisiana

  What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?

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• (646): View more from New York

  The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.

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