As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
