i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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